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Weekend Preview

The election is over and since Barack Obama won there will be college football this weekend!  Because he killed Bin Laden!  But in all seriousness, regardless of your political affiliations take solace in knowing that we have a President who cares about a college football playoff.  Mitt Romney might have fixed the economy over the next four years, but his biggest attempt to improve sports was an attempt to buy the NHL (yes, the whole league) in 2005 with Bain Capital.  And we all know the NHL is just fine without him…wait…I’m just being told the NHL is in a labor dispute that puts those of the NBA and NFL last year in a sandbox to play with blocks.  Ah well…we have college football!



Arkansas is traveling to South Carolina for a game that has “Epic South Carolina November Meltdown” written all over it for the following reasons: Arkansas is a talented team looking to actually do something right in a “why not?” game, South Carolina is missing Marcus Lattimore and has no passing game, it’s November.  Is the late season loss really a thing for the Gamecocks?  Since Steve Spurrier arrived in Columbia (prior to this season) he had lost 35 total games.  Seventeen of those have come in November or later.  That doesn’t indicate a trend in and of itself, but consider that 48.6% of his losses have come in November or later but the Gamecocks have only played 35.6% of their games during that time frame.  There’s definitely a trend.  Anecdotally, prior to last season the Gamecocks had never finished (November or later games) under Spurrier with a better than .600 late season winning percentage.  From 2007-2009 the Cocks lost 9 of those 12 late season games.  Arkansas wins.


Tennessee is going to beat Missouri convincingly just to piss off the fans that want Dooley fired.  It’s going to be turmoil-town in Knoxville!


Florida will beat Louisiana-Lafayette.  Blah, blah, blah.


Alabama will roll through Texas A&M in a game that will go a long way in showing the true gap between A&M (15th in the polls) and LSU (7th in the polls) and their identical records.  I expect Alabama to win much more comfortably than they did against LSU.  Unless Les Miles shows up to coach the Tide down.


Vanderbilt and Ole Miss are going to get together to see who the prettier school.  Ole Miss will trot out the coeds from the Grove while Vanderbilt will rally around James Franklin and his boys who are shifty, dirty but most importantly pretty.  I like Ole Miss in this football game, because if you didn’t catch my drift earlier, I think Vanderbilt is soft.


Poor little Mississippi State has to travel to LSU to take on an angry LSU team.  And trust me ladies, you won’t like Zach Mettenberger when he’s angry.  Mississippi State won’t like him either, especially if he plays the way he did against Alabama.  But even if he doesn’t, the Tigers will win this game.


Oh also, Georgia is going to do some assaulting of their own against Auburn.  You should watch. More on that game later today (and tomorrow).


Other Games


Kansas State travels to the town of Christian to take on the Texas at Christian University and their Horned Frogs this weekend.  That game is so big that it’s being aired on Fox at 7:00 PM Eastern Time.  Yeah.  Kansas State gets nationally televised games now.  Bet you wouldn’t have expected that at the beginning of the season.  But they do have Collin “Optimus” Klein at QB.  [And if I may be so bold: if you’re going to change “Prime” to “Klein” to make the nickname “Optimus Klein” in a Transformers reference, why not change “Collin” to “Calvin” to make “Calvin Klein.”  It’s not like Transformers is any cooler than Calvin Klein jeans.  If this was 1994 then both of those nicknames would be awesome, but it’s not and both of those things are only cool for losers.  I digress.]  Transitive football says TCU can win this game.  TCU beat Oklahoma State by 22 points (on the road, mind you), thus TCU = OK State + 22.  The very next week Kansas State beat OK State by 14 (at home), thus Kansas State = OK State + 14 and Kansas State = TCU – 8 points.  I’m taking the Frogs because I was on the Math Team in high school.


Who are we kidding?  Oregon is going to beat California and their bears of gold.


Last week Notre Dame struggled to steal a win from a 1-3 Big East team.  Can they do the same in defeating a 1-5 ACC team?  Unfortunately for fans of college football who hate Notre Dame (read: fans of college football) the answer is no.  But don’t tell Bill Romanowski I said that.


Must-Miss YouTube

 Good one, Bill…


That’s all I got/




Weekend Preview: What Georgia Fans Really Want

This is a rough weekend to be an SEC fan believe it or not. Not because of an impending beatdown or anything along those lines, but because there’s very little to get jacked up about until about 8:15 PM Saturday night. There are games that undoubtedly will mean something to someone somewhere for some reason (I’m talking to you Auburn fans who will actually celebrate a win over New Mexico State), but for a weekend this late in the season the conference’s slate is lacking sex appeal.

Vanderbilt is traveling to Kentucky where James Franklin will continue his Compete in 2012 Tour against a Kentucky team whose only victory this season is against the mythical State of Kent. I suspect the Commodores will drive home with a victory and he will scream victoriously, “We’re not the old Vanderbilt anymore! We have three conference wins. Last year we only had two!” while the rest of the conference laughs and the rest of the nation doesn’t notice anything at all.

Tennessee is going to get a win against a team from Alabama, unfortunately it is going to come one week too late and it’s going to come against Troy. This will have absolutely zero impact on Derek Dooley’s job security (or lack thereof) so I’m sure the Vols will win by 50.

Texas A&M will take on Mississippi State in a game that is so important it has been assigned a kick-off time that is just before most college students wake up on Saturdays. With coverage beginning at 11 AM I suspect the “Hail State” chants will have disintegrated into cries of “Hell, State” by the time I’m finished eating brunch. Aggies win.

The fine folks in Starkville spelled “Hell” wrong.

Missouri travels to Florida where I hope Sheldon Richardson and company wear their really cool, tough and not remotely hilarious shirt that commemorates their first SEC win. Come on guys, ignore the fact that the win was over Kentucky and ignore the fact that their first conference win came one week after their fourth conference loss (three of which were at home and three of which were by more than 20 points). On the radio this week someone mentioned that they thought Mizzou could upset a depleted Florida team this week. Atlanta laughed. Florida wins big.

Classic! Missouri really knows how to fit in in the SEC…by commemorating wins over Kentucky…in football!

Arkansas is looking to get back on track once again against the Tulsa Golden Hurricanes who lead Conference USA with a 5-0 record. No game is safe with John L. Smith and his USA-sized budget deficit roaming the sidelines. But I have a feeling the Razorbacks can win this one. (See what I mean about boring games?)

Auburn will be playing host to New Mexico State and the War Ealing Plains Tigers are favored by 22.5 points. How bad is New Mexico State if they are 22.5 point underdogs to a team that only has one win (Louisiana-Monroe) and has only score more than 21 points once all season (against Louisiana-Monroe)? Relative to Auburn they can’t be that bad. I think they cover the spread. But surely, surely, surely Auburn wins, right?

(Dude’s Note: How bad are the games this week? All of the games previously discussed kickoff at 12:30 Eastern Time or earlier. Three are kicking off prior to noon at their respective locales.)

Georgia and Ole Miss get rolling with the 3:30 game, but I’m such a tease you’ll have to go elsewhere to read about that.

And of course, the primetime big daddy game is Alabama at LSU. I am admittedly heavily underversed (I wouldn’t say I’m unversed, but I’m not as versed as I’d like to be.  Therefore, I’m underversed.) in knowledge regarding both of these teams. I have seen them both squads play several times (LSU probably more than Alabama just because they’ve had the more challenging/intriguing schedule) but haven’t really analyzed them – it’s like the old teachers’ adage “Are you hearing or listening?” I’ve heard but I haven’t listened. My gut says that Alabama’s defense looks every bit as good as – if not better than – LSU’s and that Alabama’s offense looks much, much better. In that regard I expect Alabama to win handily. But, LSU’s schedule (Florida, South Carolina, Texas A&M) blows away Alabama’s (Arkansas, Ole Miss, Mississippi State). Furthermore, LSU holds what I believe to be the greatest home field advantage in American sports in Baton Rouge. So, it seems like those factors could make it close (or even swing the end result). Ultimately, I do expect Alabama to win though. But again, I don’t know how heavily you should rely on that information – especially when I’m actually agreeing with both Vegas and the national pundits.

Other Games
At this juncture all that really matters is the games featuring teams ranked above Georgia in the weekly BCS poll (obviously, I’m speaking from a weekly preview perspective, it certainly matters that Georgia continue to win football games). In light of that here is what Kansas State, Notre Dame and Oregon are up to (as LSU and Bama have already been covered):


#2 Kansas State is playing host to 24th ranked Oklahoma State Saturday evening (also at 8 PM). If you have doubts about Kansas State’s defensive capabilities this should be a good game to watch. The Cowboys are averaging 44 points per game (6th in the nation) and have been held under 31 points just once this season. Georgia fans should all be rooting for Kansas State to lose, and I think this game presents as big of an opportunity as any (although TCU and Texas could also pull out upsets later in the year). The irony of OK State (who was shunned by an all-SEC National Championship game last year) essentially eliminating a Big XII team from contention this year and further opening the door for the SEC is not lost on me. I’m taking the upset here. K-State just doesn’t pass the eye pass, and I think they’re long overdue for a letdown game.

Notre Dame (3rd in the BCS) is taking on a Pitt team that is 1-3 in the Big Least Conference. I’ll save my time and yours: ND wins this game.

Lastly, #4 Oregon will square off in LA with 17th ranked USC. If there was ever a time to be a fan of Lane Kiffin it’s over the next few weeks as the Trojans could knock off both Oregon and Notre Dame. I don’t think that will happen this week, however. But boy I’d like to see Oregon out of the way.


Must-Miss Youtube

Big props to workout buddy (when we actually do that) and DudeYouCrazy reader Jay for this week’s must-miss YouTube.  This is the scariest thing you’ll see all week…

You kids have a great weekend.

That’s all I got/


Week Seven Preview: The Summary for Georgia Fans

I’ll be out of town for a wedding this weekend, so most of the weekend previews are being composed early and posted on the usual schedule (Thursday for weekly preview and Friday for Georgia focus).  Just keep all of that in mind as I won’t have anything relevant to anything that happened after Wednesday in these posts.  I will, however, be on the Twitter machine when possible and hope to catch some games on Saturday on my phone during the wedding prayers, etc.


LSU travels to Texas A&M to take on the Aggies who have a freshman Heisman candidate playing the quarterback position.  Johnny Manziel has quite a record – both on the field and as a criminal.  After getting in a fight and wielding a fake ID this summer the youngin has managed to throw for 1680 yards and run for 676 more while producing 24 total TDs.  I expect the LSU defense to shackle Manziel better than any of the Aggies’ previous opposition and I’m counting on the Tigers to get the win.

Auburn travels to Vanderbilt this weekend in a battle obnoxious coaches who can’t quite win football games.  I’m taking the Commies here.  Anchor Down you gold and black sailors!

South Carolina travels to Steve Spurrier’s old swampin’ ground to take on the Gators of Florida in a 3:30 kickoff this Saturday.  This is the game of the century of the week this week.  Georgia fans will be rooting for Florida for one of the first times ever while South Carolina will be striving to put a loss to pesky LSU behind them.  As I’m writing this (Wednesday evening) Marcus Lattimore is not a sure-thing (he bwuised his wittle hip bone), but I’m betting that Spurrier is just being coy and the hoss will play.  Defensive Tackle Kelcy Quarles is also (or at least should be) out for punching an LSU player in the type of classy move that typically doesn’t garner suspension from Spurrier because it’s hard for him to be hypocritical of Mark Richt’s suspended players if he actually suspends his own thugs.  I think Florida has a lot of momentum right now and with the homefield advantage and a banged-up Lattimore I expect them to win.

Mississippi State continues to prowl through a daunting schedule as they take on the Blue Raiders from MTSU.  Add this powerhouse to the long list of stout opponents Mississippi State has already taken down (Jackson State, Troy, South Alabama, Kentucky, etc.) and you have the recipe for an obnoxious group of cowbell ringing fans thinking their team is awesome at 7-0 and a bitter DudeYouCrazy because he refuses to believe them.

Georgia takes on Kentucky but I’ll tell you about that in another post.

Alabama gets to take on the Tennessee Vols in a game that some orange jumpsuit wearers are afraid may see more Crimson than Puke in Neyland Stadium.  That would be hilarious.  Almost as hilarious as a Tennessee upset.  But more realistic.  Alabama wins.


I’m keeping it short and sweet as I’m on a strict time budget this week, so I’m not covering anything outside of the SEC.  But as always, thanks for reading and check back tomorrow for the Georgia / Kentucky preview.

That’s all I got/



Week Six Preview: How Bulldogs Fans Should Cheer

I hope that the Georgia Bulldogs have a restful weekend before regrouping next week to take on the Kentucky Wildcats and prepare for the Florida Gators.  This off weekend couldn’t have come at a better time.  Here’s to an arrest-free break!


Around the SEC

Auburn travels to Ole Miss this weekend to take on a Rebels team that is actually better than anyone thought.  One look at Mississippi’s résumé  wins over Central Arkansas, UTEP and Tulane and you can tell that the Rebellious boys from Oxford are here to play, am I right?  On the other hand, I’m not sure what Auburn is here to do, but I don’t think it involves a bowl game.  At 1-4 with games against A&M, Georgia and Bama remaining it seems all but guaranteed that the Tigers finish below .500.  To make matters worse they have to travel to Ole Miss and Vandy in back-to-back weeks in games that should be sure-fire W’s but are shaping up to be quite dicey.  I think Auburn wins this game though, because as bad as I think Auburn is I think Ole Miss is even worse.  But, I’d love to be wrong here.

Abuurn’s finest.

Alabama makes the grueling tripto Columbia, MO where no SEC school has lost this season to take on the still winless in Conference play Missouri Tigers.  The Tigers remain that way and fall to 0-4 in the conference much to my delight.

Vanderbilt gets to play host to the chomping green monsters from Gainesville this weekend as Will Muschamp and his Florida Gators head north.  Here are the reasons why I think Vanderbilt could win this game:        .   Here is why I want them to win this game: It would mean really good things for the Georgia Bulldogs and it would be hilarious.  Here is who will win this game: Florida.

Kentucky and Arkansas are getting together in this week’s least-watched game.  I really want to see John L. Smith get on a hot-streak because I know he’s probably betting against himself in Vegas every week and still somehow blowing it.  So I’m taking the hogs.  Woo pig sooie!

The Cocks from South Carolina are making their way south to take on the cocks Tigers from the Bayou in what may be the game of the week.  First and foremost: LSU is not that good from what I’ve seen.  Secondly, South Carolina only has looked awesome against UGA.  Third, this game is in the raucous, bourbon and spice-soaked armpit of the SEC that is Baton Rouge.  LSU could really win this game.  I need them to.  You need them to.  They have to.  LSU wins!

Texas A&M gets to play their makeup game from Hurricane Whoever against Louisiana Tech this weekend.  What a fortuitous postponement that proved to be.  A&M skipped a week and promptly got beaten by Florida before winning four-straight and proving that the SEC bias does indeed reside at the bottom of the Coaches Poll where the Aggies are now ranked 22nd thanks to wins against Southern Methodist, South Carolina State, Arkansas and Ole Miss.  LA Tech has somehow finagled its way to a 5-0 start and a top-25 ranking as well.  Who would have thunk it?  A top-25 matchup.  Aggies win.

I hope Louisiana Tech doesn’t mind a $3.00 convenience charge.  Because when you mess with aTm that’s what you get!

Tennessee will get to dig in at lovely Starkville, MS as Double-D Derek Dooley tries to beat a different set of Bulldogs and dance his little orange pants off.  I don’t believe in Mississippi State.  I really don’t.  The Tennessee Volunteers win this one.


Other Biz-nasty

Texas is taking on Oklahoma in a game that really used to have relevance not that long ago but now just seems like a slowmotion 30 for 30 waiting to be made.  You know the type that isn’t that interesting but you feel obligated to watch because you like Bill Simmons and you know that most of the films are really good and this one will eventually redeem itself, only it never does?  Any one?  No?  OK, then maybe you’ll enjoy this game.  But I won’t.

Stanford will beat Notre Dame and that’s all I have to say about that.


What Georgia Fans Want This Weekend:

Here is your How-to-Root During the Off-Week Cheat Sheet:

  • Root against Florida.  You probably already do, but root against them this week.  Any loss by Florida (especially an unexpected one) helps Georgia.
  • Root for LSU.  Yes, that’s hard to do.  But if they can beat South Carolina things could start looking up.

What if Vanderbilt beat Florida this week and LSU beat South Carolina?  Then next week what if Florida beat South Carolina?  Then what if Georgia beat Florida the following week?  Georgia punches a ticket to ATL, that’s what.


Must-Miss YouTube

 Highpoints of this video include:

  • Redneck Mississippi Cattle Raisers
  • DE Denico Autry milking a cow
  • Bulldogs Beefin Up

Look for some type of Live-Blog/Thread during the games tomorrow.  If I can get the tech-side of it worked out it could be fun.  Thanks for reading.  Everybody have a great weekend.

That’s all I got/


PS: This has been the most read week in DudeYouHistory, so many thanks to all the new folks who are reading/commenting, and of course thanks to all the old followers out there (that means you, Bulldawg20)!  I can’t exactly say that you all make the world go ’round, but you do make my comment section more entertaining, so please keep it up.  

Next week I’ll be running several mid-season recaps on my preseason SEC Picks as well as the more routine Georgia-oriented game preview stuff.

Week Five Preview

Thursday Night Football

I suffered through about 10 minutes of Thursday night football last night as Southern Cal staged a comeback against Utah.  Frankly two things bothered me:

  • How sickly and un-scary David Pollack looks.
  • How much praise USC was getting for coming back against a Utah team that was 2-2 heading into the game with losses to Arizona State and Utah State.  I’m happy for Southern Cal and their seemingly-miraculous comeback (as far as Jesse “The Hair” Palmer), but should a really good team ever trail Utah 14-0 three minutes into the game?  The answer is no.

 Thankfully there is some good football coming our way this weekend.



 Auburn hosts Arkansas in a game of two equally domineering forces.  I pick Arkansas every week and John L. Smith (aka “The Negative $40 Million Dollar Man) makes sure that my prediction is wrong.  Similarly every week Auburn makes sure that their offense (and sometimes defense) is just plain wrong.  Who will win out in this game?  Auburn is favored by 10 points, which blows my mind because I don’t know that Auburn is 10 points better than any FBS team in the country.  In the spirit of tradition I’m taking Arkansas, who I know will at least cover the spread.  Right?  Prove me wrong, John L.  I Dare you.

Mississippi State travels to Kentucky in a game that is sure to be watched by hundreds of people around the country.  I’d love to see the Wildcats upset the Bulldogs and dethrone the reigning, “Wait, They’re Ranked How High?” Champs.  Here’s how it could happen.  Mississippi State boasts the 13th best scoring defense in the country (13.3), but that figure is deceptive.  That figure doesn’t show you that MSU’s opponents (Jackson State, Auburn, Troy, and South Alabama) have combined to play a total of just five other games against BCS Conference opponents and in those five games they’ve averaged only 7.2 points per game.  So, MSU’s 13.3 is inflated by crappy opposition.  Kentucky’s offense, on the other hand, is deflated by already squaring off against Florida and South Carolina (two of the top 10 scoring defenses in the nation at 10th and 6th respectively) and a respectable Louisville squad (30th in the nation in scoring defense).  MSU is a 15.5 point favorite, and there is no evidence to support that claim.  Furthermore if you’re looking for an SEC upset (especially one involving a loss by a ranked team from Mississippi), this might be the one.  UPSET ALERT!  ALERT! I AM UPSET!


Vanderbilt gets to make a little trip to the “harsh” environment that is Columbia, MO and take on the Missouri Tigers.

If you missed by Twitter-rific criticisms of Missouri’s Stadium during the UGA/Mizzou game here’s a quick recap:


I will continue to root against the presence of Missou in the SEC by taking Vanderbilt in this game.  That being said,  if Missouri does happen to lose to Vandy they will not become the “New Vandy.”  Vanderbilt is the New Vandy.  Missouri will simply be the “Dumb Vandy.”


Texas A&M will travel to the home of the Oxford Shirt and its convenient lack of need for ironing to take on the Ole Miss Rebels.  Again, nobody will watch this game, but I promise somebody will vouch for the Aggies’ win when it’s all said and done.


Next to last, but certainly not next to least: Florida plays host to LSU in a battle for crappiest football-driven college town with the winner taking home a conference win.  I wrote about this yesterday with some arithmetic, and was then asked who I thought would win.  I am picking the Gators here for several reasons:

  1.  LSU looks wildly inconsistent
  2. Florida has been tested more (road games at hostile environments)
  3. Florida’s biggest question-mark coming into the season, QB play, has been good so far, but at worst will coincide with LSU’s biggest question.
  4. Florida looks better to me.


And of course check back later for a full Georgia vs. South Carolina preview in which I predict a Georgia win, because that pattern has been workin’ 4 me as the kiddies say.


Other Games


Nebraska travels to the world’s largest horseshoe that was purchased with tattoos to take on the Ohio State buckeyes in game pitting an annoying QB who likes to run against an annoying Coach who likes to run his mouth.  I’m taking the annoying the Buckeyes by a buckeye – not sure if that implies close game or a blowout.


Washington fresh off an upset of undeniably untalented Stanford will lose its top-25 ranking this weekend against Oregon.  That’s it.


And for the first time in his life West Virginia will see a defense that is not merely a sign featuring picket-work in the crowd as the Mountaineers take on Texas.  Here are a few bold predictions for the game in Austin:

  • Geno will not complete 83.4% of his passes
  • Geno will not throw for his standard 432 yards
  • Geno will not throw five TD passes
  • Geno’s QB rating will be under 208.4
  • Geno’s team will either lose or win the game and I won’t care either way


That’s all I got/


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