Category Archives: Auburn

HOOO BOY WEEK 3 IS LEGIT


Let’s start with this: I hope Penn State loses to Temple, thus rendering the PedoBears 3rd best in Pennsylvania. That game starts at noon, and so do the following:

#2 Florida State at #10 Louisville: Have you heard of Lamar Jackson? Lamar Jackson scored 13 touchdowns in his first 60 minutes of play this year. Lamar Jackson is a sophomore. Lamar Jackson did this:

And that’s just the Louisville side. Can’t think I remember GameDay being a nooner before, but hey. Early season scheduling, man.

#25 Miami at App State: This….is a game that is happening. No words, man.

There’s other football on at noon, but that pair (plus Penn State losing to Temple) should be the CRUNKEST noon slate ever.

#1 Alabama  at #19 Ole Miss: The best of the mid-afternoon bunch, but…

#22 Oregon at Nebraska: The classic “Oregon is garbage against the run, and Nebraska can’t run the ball”; and

Colorado at #6 Michigan: Jim Harbaugh, certified obnoxious sociopath, refuses to publish weekly depth charts. Then he got pissed about Colorado’s for this week:

And hey, if you can get it, Syracuse at South Florida and Pitt at Oklahoma State both stand to be really fun.

The evening features two games between SEC West coaches that need wins to stay off the hotseat, and that’s just the tip of the iceberg. If you don’t have Xfinity’s 8-channel “previous” option, you need to establish a favorites list.

The aforementioned SEC West Anxiety Bowls: Mississippi State at #20 LSU (MSU’s Dan Mullen is the safest of these four coaches but wants out of Starkville) and Texas A&M at Auburn.

Buuuuutttttt….you’re an SEC homer if you jump on those.

(Georgia plays at Mizzou on SEC Network, they start at 7:30)

#3 Ohio State at #14 Oklahoma: I think Ohio State has 13-0 laid out for them if they win at OU. Even if not, they are in good position to win the B1G because the B1G is awful. The Big XII is also awful, and Oklahoma could lose this and become the first two-loss playoff team.

#12 Michigan State at #18 Notre Dame: I guess its interesting.

USC at #7 Stanford: Watch USC win this game just to troll us all.


Do your chores, skip GameDay, and saddle up. Don’t start drinking til around 5 if you want to make it through the marquees and the Dawgs.

Here’s What Mattered in Week 2


Yes, I know this is like five days late. 

As the urgent post stated last night, we had to get the bad taste of the Nicholls embarrassment out of our collective mouths. Let’s talk about it and move on.

What Happened with Georgia

Beat Nicholls 26-24, and it was precisely that ugly. Who said Mark Richt was gone?

Okay, done.

What Happened with the SEC

  • 30 for 30: the Florida/Kentucky rivalry. This is a game played by unpaid 18-22 year-olds and an oblong football. 30 straight wins at ANYTHING is amazing.
    • Sidebar: Kentucky is a straight trash fire.
  • South Carolina’s SEC East lead was short-lived, huh? Mississippi State takes a commanding lead in the SEC West with a 27-14 win over the Cocks.
  • Tennessee beat Va Tech 45-24, but were they any good? Josh Dobbs threw for 91, Kamara and Hurd rushed for a combined 108…Tennessee has recovered 10 of 12 total fumbles in their two games this year. I bet that luck will even out.
  • LSU changed quarterbacks, Nick Saban was mad at a 28-point win over the defending CUSA champ, Ole Miss, A&M, Auburn, Vandy, and Mizzou beat hapless opponents.
  • Arkansas won a wild one against TCU, and it was the best game of the week. When you have a 6’10 O-lineman forcing overtime with a blocked kick, you get giffed.

What Else Was Fun

Got to start with the snark alert: Penn State lost a game to Pitt, who should not be their rival. Setting up the game this coming week in which they…honor Joe Paterno.

Get out of your asses and a little less tonedeaf, Penn State.

Beyond that…gotta be real with y’all. Did not get to watch much non-SEC/UNC football. Oklahoma State got hosed, weird things happened after midnight.

Back in an hour with some analysis on a much more fun week 3.

The Teams that Matter, Ranked

  1. Alabama…go Rebs.
  2. Florida State?? This ish could change by 2:30pm tomorrow.
  3. Ohio State.
  4. Houston. I’m watching them make me regret that pick right now.
  5. Michi…gahhhheffit. I used to like Michigan before Jim Harbaugh got there.
  6. Clemson, with some downward momentum. Like, a lot.
  7. Ole Miss…go Rebs.
  8. Stanford, who could lose 3 games in the next month.

I don’t think Tennessee, Michigan State, Texas, Louisville, Notre Dame, or Georgia merit mention here.

 

 

What We Learned From A Wild Week 1


More rambling thoughts and reactions from Week 1’s stacked slate. 

SEC Thoughts:

It was a pretty strange week in SEC country. Alabama did what it does every year, and asserted its dominance right out of the gate by dominating a name program (beat USC 52-6). One can always hold out hope for the perfect storm of miscues and the Tide loss, but true freshman Jalen Hurts is probably the most talented QB to play at Bama in the Nick Saban era. And he’ll be there for at least the next three years. Yikes. They outgained SC by almost 300 yards, had near-perfect balance on offense, and were dominant on defense.

Outside of that, Georgia and Texas A&M probably tie for the most impressive week 1’s. A&M has a defense for once, but with a questionable offense still likely has a 9-win ceiling at most. Based on what I saw with the Dawgs, they SHOULD be considered the favorites in the SEC East. Here’s hoping they can shore up the rough edges before the big game in Oxford in 17 days.

The rest of the SEC was, quite frankly, trash. Mississippi State literally CLANGA’d the goalpost to lose to South Alabama, 21-20. Florida couldn’t get anything going on offense and beat UMass 24-7. Tennessee should’ve lost to App State. Arkansas should’ve lost to Louisiana Tech.

Among the impressive losers, Ole Miss’ first half against FSU was SCARY good. Second half was typical Ole Miss. Auburn was probably most impressive in forcing an off night from Deshaun Watson and having a couple of chances to win late.

LSU was not an impressive loser. For the first time, I understand the “Fire Les Miles” camp.

The most hilarious things transpired with the remnants of the SEC East. South Carolina and Vandy proved that, while stubborn, are going to have to drag teams into rockfights to compete in-conference this year (they won’t). Mizzou…only gave up 26 to West Virginia? Scoring 11 registers as an improvement over their vs. P5 points per game a year ago. And Kentucky. Oh, Kentucky. The offensive coordinator they fired this offseason put up the final 34 points CONSECUTIVELY in a hilarious 44-35 Southern Miss win.

If Tennessee and Florida don’t get it together, Georgia had freaking better return to Atlanta in December.

Teams I Like Better Than Others, Ranked: 

  1. Alabama– self explanatory.
  2. Florida State– I was ready to bury them as they fell behind 28-6, Deondre Francois looked completely lost, and the defense looked even more lost. A couple of Chad Kelly mistakes let the Noles back in, and the rest was history. Second-half FSU is the second-best team in the country.
  3. Ohio State– drubbed Bowling Green 77-10, which is fine. If they can take advantage of Oklahoma’s unwillingness to run the ball on Sept. 17, I’ll call them a playoff lock.
  4. Houston– not their fault that OU didn’t run the ball.
  5. Clemson– the defense (probably because Auburn) was stout, and Deshaun Watson won’t be that off again all season.
  6. Stanford– Pac-12 is hot garbage.
  7. Ole Miss– yeah, they lost, but the Landsharks were SWARMING and the offense was unstoppable…for a half. If they can put that together consistently (they probably can’t!) they can still be a problem.
  8. Michigan– (begrudgingly)
  9. Louisville– Lamar Jackson had 8 first-half TD’s. Sure, the opponent was Charlotte, but…damn.

Cool Things That Happened:

This is the coolest sports thing I’ve ever seen: Nebraska took a delay of game to honor fallen punter Sam Foltz. And Fresno State declined the penalty.

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Texas and Notre Dame played an amazing game. Shane Buechele and new OC Sterlin Gilbert looked like a possible answer for Texas’ long-running QB problems, and Charlie Strong got carried off the field for the second time in under a year. He doesn’t deserve the criticism he’s gotten for cleaning up Mack Brown’s program, and he may be turning the corner. Or not. You never know with Texas these days.

FCS UPSETS! Virginia’s 37-20 loss to Richmond was too predictable. Washington State lost to Portland State to open last year, and finished 9-4. They followed that template with a loss to Eastern Washington. Northern Iowa ruined Matt Campbell’s debut at Iowa State 25-20 (and makes you wonder if the Big XII expansion rumors can include relegation of ISU and Kansas). EVEN THOUGH KANSAS WON A FOOTBALL GAME, knocking off fellow FCS member Rhode Island.

Back later today as we start looking towards week 2 (which is garbage, by the way).

Video #DYCPicks: Week 1 Picks Against the Spread – Every SEC Game + Top 25 vs. Top 25 Match Up


Date Time Favorite Underdog Pick
1-Sep 7:30 Tennessee (-20.5) App State (+20.5) Tennessee (-20.5)
1-Sep 8:00 Vanderbilt (-4) South Carolina (+4) South Carolina (+4)
3-Sep 12:00 Oklahoma (-12) Houston (+12) Oklahoma (-12)
3-Sep 12:00 Mississippi State (-28) South Alabama (+28) South Alabama (+28)
3-Sep 12:00 West Virginia (-10) Missouri (+10) West Virginia (-10)
3-Sep 3:30 Texas A&M (-3) UCLA (+3) UCLA (+3)
3-Sep 3:30 LSU (-10) Wisconsin (+10) LSU (-10)
3-Sep 4:00 Arkansas (-26) Louisiana Tech (+26) Louisiana Tech (+26)
3-Sep 5:30 Georgia (-2.5) North Carolina (+2.5) Georgia (-2.5)
3-Sep 7:30 Kentucky (-6) Southern Miss (+6) Kentucky (-6)
3-Sep 7:30 Florida (-36.5) Umass (+36.5) Florida (-36.5)
3-Sep 8:00 Alabama (-11) USC (+11) Alabama (-11)
3-Sep 9:00 Clemson (-7) Auburn (+7) Clemson (-7)
3-Sep 2:00 Washington (-26.5) Rutgers (+26.5) Rutgers (+26.5)
5-Sep 8:00 Florida State (-4) Ole Miss (+4) Florida State (-4)

 

Watch the video with some of my comrades as well.

 

Be sure to subscribe to my real gig podcast (The Investing Podcast) on iTunes to watch me demolish these fools all season long.

 

That’s all I got/

Andrew

 

 

SECual Healing: Chubb Return and Bigtime Dismissals


(Shouldn’t Lead with this Headline, but I Got My Morning Chubb)

Let’s get the important thing out of the way: Nick Chubb might be Jesus. Modern medicine has come a great ways as it relates to devastating knee injuries in sports, but Chubb’s was worse than those.

Since his training videos leaked in the spring, there’s been a sneaking, optimistic suspicion that Chubb was going to defy the odds and suit up in (!!!) less than a month against UNC. Seeing it actually happen and become a certainty? Amazing. And it gives Georgia a little more flexibility to start Jacob Eason with Chubb as a safety net.

Certainly, there’s still the issue of seeing how the knee holds up against contact, and the ‘yips’ of returning from a major injury.

15 carries for about 110 and two scores sounds about right.

Holy Dismissals

News broke around 6pm that Auburn had dismissed presumptive starting RB Jovon Robinson. Their depth chart is worse than a Chubb-and-Michel-less Georgia’s now, as Peyton Barber went pro early (that was news to me) and Roc Thomas transferred out.

More shocking and impactful than that, though, was the pair at Missouri. Its no secret that Mizzou’s success has been almost exclusively due to ridiculous defensive lines. Walter Brady led FBS freshmen in sacks last year with 8, and Harold Brantley went from feel-good story to cautionary tale. Brantley was severely injured in a car accident coming off a promising sophomore season, and Mizzou was banking on both as starters.

If the D can’t hold teams under…like…8 points, its gonna be a long season for the Zoo.

Let’s Hope Kirby Doesn’t Bring This Sabanism to Georgia

Just deplorable. Old petty man with a Napoleon complex.

Give It A Rest, Dude

/hashtag wanking motion/

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