Hard Knocks with the Atlanta Falcons: Cool Breeze


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Welcome to episode 4, the one where feelings get hurt. Every year, the Hard Knocks team makes you care about a small group of rookies, and this is the episode that starts the thinning of that herd. That said, a big tip of the cap to the production crew and the front office for not giving me rookies to care about who might not make the team. Sure, I’m glad Jake Matthews panned out, but I’m just as glad that I don’t have to care about these other guys. On to the break down!

LIKES

– It is nice to see a team with an actual Special Teams coach.

– Roddy White understands that time moves forward, not backwards, and that he is indeed the old guy on the team. I like this, but Rust Cohle does not approve of his temporal breakdown.

– Bryan Cox lives in Hageman’s head. Got a nice two bed room in his head space, might take out a wall, really open up the living room. Add some flow.

– Mike Tice needs a button down shirt line. Immediately.

– Devin Hester caught a football. Law of averages.

– Julio Jones is magic on the football field.

– We were thisclose to this recap just being Bryan Cox quotes. I reserve the right to do that next week.

– Bryan Cox’s strongly held views on Adam Sandler movies is the first time I’ve questioned drafting him as a life coach. But I’ll get past it.

DISLIKES

– Watching coaches break down film after a loss is the most depressing thing in the world. Just watching jobs get taken, peppered with coach speak (cliches and profanity). Better than opening with ACL surgery, I guess.

– Mike Smith is so boring that he has to crib notes from a Tony Gonzalez speech from last season.

– An Atlanta-based Hard Knocks, and the workout montage is to Xzibit’s 2006 song Concentrate. Someone screwed something up here.

– NFL players houses make me regret going into the blogger life. Ah, what could have been.

– OH MY GOD, THE FALCONS EMPLOY SCOTT PIOLI? I feel like I erased that from my memory. If you AREN’T aware of Pioli’s well documented history of douchebaggery, Google “Pioli + Chiefs”. PS – using quotes and a plus sign in Google searches, old blogger trick.

– Little known fact: if you get fined in an preseason game (chop block, leg whip, getting thrown out of a game), then you owe the money. If you’re a vet, not the worst deal. But for rookies, owing $15-20,000 and then getting CUT can be a real gut punch.

– Was really nervous they were going to mass cut those guys in the team meeting room. Glad they did the one-on-one thing, was a little nervous early. And I GOTTA hear the game they spit,cause a couple of these guys damn near thanked Dimitroff and Smitty when they got cut.

One more week to watch rookies try for jobs, starters play a series, and by god real life NFL games start. I’ll be here tomorrow with our final Aaron Murray Watch of the preseason, and keep an eye on the site as SOMEONE is going to be live blogging the UGA/Clemson game Saturday (spoilers: it’ll probably be me), so I hope to see you there. To any bubble players on the Falcons left, make sure you watch for the hook.

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Posted on August 28, 2014, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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