Disagreeing with Gurshall, Halle Berry and other SEC Stories from the week
ESPN.com has a write-up on Todd Gurley and Keith Marshall. If you don’t like to read the summary is this: They’re really good football players, but they’re surprisingly low-key off the field. I do have one bone to pick with these two Dawgs. Apparently they don’t play video games because video games are too low-key, and yet they recently took a trip to the movie theater to screen The Call. Halle Berry or no Halle Berry that movie’s entire plot hinges on a series of phone calls. That sounds more boring than a video game. The Call is sitting at a 39% on Rotten Tomatoes. Entertainment Weekly offered the most glowing review as follows: If you’re going to watch a move in which two people talk on the phone for most of the film, it’s not the worst thing in the world for one of the folks involved to have the face of Storm from the X-Men. Come on Gurshall!
Bob Stoops is Stoopid
This thing has probably been overblown, but in any event Big Game Bob (1-3 in BCS Championship Games, 1-5 in his last six BCS Bowls) deserves to be criticized. But I already did that.
Florida is Stupid
In 2012 the Florida Gators ranked 78th in offensive points per game. Here are a few of the Gators’ offensive highlights:
- Scoring 20 against Texas A&M
- Scoring 14 against LSU
- Scoring 9 against Georgia
- Scoring 14 against Missouri
- Scoring 23 against FCS Jacksonville State
- Scoring 23 against
Division IIBig East Louisville.
Those are they type of feats you achieve when your offense ranks 104th (out of 124 teams) in yards per game. How do you maintain that type of production? You keep your coaching staff in-tact. How do you do that? You give your Offensive Coordinator a $100k raise. Now that’s offensive.
Head Hog’s Kitchen
Bret Bielema tweeted a picture of a dog on a counter in his kitchen. I can’t out-do the coverage that has already been given this story, so read this for more thorough analysis. Get Bielemic!
If you enjoy the awkwardness of filmed comedy that is only enjoyed by those who were involved in the production of filming said comedy, then you’re going to love Auburn’s new series “The Bookstore.” The timing of this is certainly ill-advised as it’s made as some type of disgusting knockoff of “The Office.” I feel like “Office” parodies were awesome seven of eight years ago, but as the show winds down most of the people still watching just hang around out of sense of obligation (I know this because I am one of those people). Why capitalize on “The Office” now? Why anything, Auburn? Part one is here. Part two is here.