Category Archives: Not Sports

The REAL Story Behind Yesterday’s Recruiting Coup


According to Andrew, yesterday was a pretty big day for Georgia’s 2016 recruiting haul, as they secured commitments from two five-star recruits. Bringing in a top-flight QB early in a recruiting cycle is always huge for momentum, as they tend to be ring leaders among their recruiting class peers. This is all great news.

Unless…we’re being taken for a ride by our fearless leader.

2016 QB Jacob Eason hall2

 

What do you see here? For my money, I can’t get past the fact that this Jacob Eason character is, in fact…

Andrew Hall.

But why? Why would Andrew do this? 

Two theories I can think of, which are intertwined: first, Andrew is a diehard Georgia football fan. I don’t know the nature of his relationship with his wife, but if he loves her more than Georgia football, the man has a heart the size of Sanford Stadium. Getting word of a ‘commitment’ from a Stafford-esque QB out 19 months before Signing Day 2016? A great way to drum up some long-term recruiting success for the Georgia program.

The issue here is, I have seen Andrew throw a football. So either he’s been doing a LOT of training behind the scenes, or Mark Richt, Mike Bobo, and recruiting evaluators nationwide missed the mark on this ‘prospect’.

The fact that Andrew moved recently? Ties right in to this elaborate ruse. All ATLiens will admit to seeing less of Andrew in recent months, and between an intense training schedule and high school classes in Washington state, it all starts to piece itself together.

ruse

Secondly, at DudeYouCrazy.net, we claim not to care about being ‘sources’. In the wake of the Tray Matthews story, Daniel, Jason, and I realized that being the purveyor of new information isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Andrew, on the other hand? Well, frankly it changed him. He has the unquenchable bloodlust to provide breaking information, accuracy be damned. I have the transcript of his conversation with ESPN’s Chris Broussard, who called and congratulated us for breaking the Matthews news.

You were a schemer, you had plans, and look where that got you. Nobody credited you for TriggaTray’s dismissal news. I just did what I do best. I took your little plan and I turned it on itself. Look what I did to the newscycle with a few anonymous sources and a couple of informal GM polls. Hmmm? You know… You know what I’ve noticed? Nobody panics when things go “according to plan.” Even if the plan is horrifying! If, tomorrow, I tell the press that, like, Adrian Peterson is retiring, or Kevin Durant is being traded to the Lakers, nobody panics, because it’s all “part of the plan.” But when I say that one little Miami mini-dynasty will die, well then everyone loses their minds! Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos. I’m an agent of chaos. Oh, and you know the thing about chaos? It’s fair!

We thought we had Hall’s sourcelust bottled up. We kept him busy with SEC previews, Daily Doses of Dawg, and his normal DudeYouCrazy.net siterunner duties. We thought this problem would go away if we ignored it. Never in a million years did we think Hall was capable of this: emerging as a 5-star QB prospect, convincing recruiters everywhere that he was from the Pacific Northwest, and then committing at Dawg Night— and doing it all so he could break the news.

Boy, were we wrong. Please accept a formal DudeYouCrazy.net apology from me, Chad Floyd.

 

 

Georgia Football: Bachelorette Spoiler! Josh Murray and Andi Dorfman’s Conversation in the Fantasy Suite


We’ve obtained a transcript of a conversation between former Dawg Josh Murray and Andi Dorfman in the Fantasy Suite episode of The Bachelorette. Obviously: SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

 

Josh: [Hugging Andi, staring deeply into her eyes] I’ve been waiting a long time for this.

Andi: [Flirting] Have you?  How long have you been waiting?

Josh: All season. All season long. I’ve been wanting this as long as I’ve been here.

Andi: Well that’s a bit forward! 

Josh: What can I say? I’m all about some Fantasy!

Andi: Oh, are you?

Josh: Oh I am. You’re about to find out. Where’s that couch? [Makes a strong, athletic move toward the sofa.]

Andi: Slow down, cowboy.

Josh: Oh, I’m not a cowboy. I just play one in strip clubs on group dates. I’m a former professional baseball player. [Unzips pants, pulls out surprisingly well-concealed laptop.]

Josh: Let’s get down to Fantasy. I got offered Jose Abreu for Robinson Cano outright. I mean it’s a classic power vs. consistency play. And I’d be lying if I told you I couldn’t use Abreu’s homers and RBIs.

Andi: Wait what?

Josh: Oh I just jump in with my Fantasies, babe.  No foreplay here. Ain’t no Fantasy as sweet [Winking to emphasize the Fantasy Suite pun] as Fantasy Baseball.

 

 

That’s all I got/

Andrew

 

DudeYouPodcast: The Weekly Sports Hangover


Daniel Palmer (@Dpalm66 on Twitter), Chad Floyd (@Chad_Floyd) and Andrew Hall (@DudeYouCrazy) gather to discuss ketchup and the week’s biggest sports stories.  Obviously, LeBron James, his letter and the Cleveland Cavaliers are discussed.  The ending of the World Cup is brought up as is the Major League Baseball All Star Game.

 

Be sure to download and subscribe to the podcast on iTunes here.

Stream online via Spreaker, or check it out on Stitcher Radio.

Weekly Hangover Live!


Weekly Hangover. Live. Saturday noon eastern. Come for the jokes, stay for the…well, jokes.

Saving you from college football – less Saturdays one inane conversation at a time.

Love this? Hate it? Think I’m an idiot? Don’t just curse at me under your breath, head to the Dude You Podcast iTunes page, and leave a 5-star review to make sure I know it, and have your voice heard on the air. Follow me at https://twitter.com/dpalm66

 

 

Donald Sterling: We Thought You Knew


Since the recordings of Donald Sterling’s rants dropped Saturday, we’ve all been inundated with tales of how dedicated he was to his antiquated world view, to the tune of the largest housing discrimination settlement ever obtained by the Justice Department. More and more, as these tapes bled over into mainstream news, more racist quotes attributed to him covering his entire time as an owner in the NBA were made known, and public sentiment has turned even more violently against him. Hell, even Michael “Republicans buy shoes too” Jordan weighed in on the situation, and his reluctance to take stances on social issues is legendary. The pitchforks around Sterling are growing in number, and Adam Silver’s press conference today will be watched and analyzed by everyone from ESPN to Lifetime (probably not Lifetime).

My only question is: why now?

Intellectually, I understand why now. TMZ, which has curiously emerged as the go to reliable source for breaking news, sparked the current inferno, but why didn’t more people know about this. Chad Floyd and I were roommates about three years back, and a running joke around our house/condo/death trap upon hearing anything terrible in the news was that it was somehow Donald Sterling’s fault. It was my assumption that everyone followed sports as closely as we did, and that this was common knowledge. But as I talked to people – SMART people – over the last few days, it became readily apparent that indeed, Sterling’s long and storied history of douchebaggery had eluded the general public. Was this a concerted effort by David Stern in hopes that the old man’s idiocy could be ignored until he died? Probably. Was it the 29 other owners (all of whom are less tenured than he) regarding him as an embarrassing member, who weren’t really surprised by his comments? Apparently. Did buying his way into an NAACP Lifetime Achievement Award in 2009, even when he was embroiled in a discrimination lawsuit with NBA Legend Elgin Baylor help smokescreen EVERYTHING else? Quite well, thanks for asking. So well, in fact, that the LA Chapter of the NAACP was ready to give him a second Lifetime Achievement Award (two lifetimes?) until this story broke.

Two lifetimes? Is this guy a vampire?

Actual ad in the LA Times

So now, the question being bandied about is what does the NBA do to punish Sterling. It’s an interesting question, if not only because he’s a racist dickbag, but also because he is objectively the worst owner in professional sports over the past thirty years. Seriously.  From 1981, when he bought the team, the Clippers have generated the lowest winning percentage of any of the four major professional sports in America, but it never mattered to him, because he was making money hand over fist. There have been some owners who are taking an admirable stance that he should be expelled from the league, but others are advising caution for a number of reasons. I am interested to see what Silver and the NBA CAN do because 1. I am not a lawyer (sorry Mom!) and 2. the NBA constitution is a secret document.

Let’ say the NBA is able to force him to sell, an option I think is NOT on the table, and look at what the whole situation: He bought a bad team for $12.5 million, and the most recent sale of a bad team in the NBA was of the Bucks this spring for $550 million. If he is forced to sell, look for the Clippers to earn him WAY MORE than $550 million. The Clippers have advantages over the Bucks in star players (Chris Paul and Blake Griffin), facilities (Staples Center), winning culture (consecutive playoff appearances), and location (not Milwaukee). So, even if they take away the team, this man walks with TONS of money. TONS. And no real incentive to address his beliefs and actions that have been designed to systematically oppress people for years. Bomani Jones wrote this nine years ago, and it got more reads yesterday than it has since it was posted. Nothing he said became more true, people are just now paying attention.

Chad and I joked about the lunacy of Donald Sterling three years ago partially because tragedy + time = comedy, but it’s harder to laugh now that people know and are just focusing on the audio recording made by his mistress who is being sued by his wife for embezzlement. And by embezzlement, she means the fact that Donald gave his mistress over $1.2 million dollars in gifts and money. I hope this leads to a larger conversation about the culture that Sterling espouses, but this is America and talking HONESTLY about race makes everyone uncomfortable, so probably not.

FWIW, I’m calling indefinite suspension, and a 5 million dollar fine. Book it.

Love this? Hate it? Think I’m an idiot? Don’t just curse at me under your breath, head to the Dude You Podcast iTunes page, and leave a 5-star review to make sure I know it, and have your voice heard on the air. Follow me at https://twitter.com/dpalm66

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